Do you feel like your man doesn’t always understand what you’re trying to say?
The best way to have somebody understand you is to speak their language, so, use these football terms to send him a clear message!
This is the general term for any penalty, so if you’re not happy about something but not sure which is the right penalty (like maybe beause you wanted a necklace for your birthday but they bought you a blender) just say “I’m calling a flag on that play” and explain what you doesn’t work for you.
This is when the quarterback doesn’t like the play that was agreed to with the coach and changes it at the last minute. So if you need to make a sudden change of plans (like the parking lot seems too full to park for a movie) say you’re “calling an audible” and suggest something else.
This is when the team has one last try to move the ball before the other team gets it back. When your man has really upset you about something (or keeps forgetting to do something they promise) and on thing ice tell him “listen, you’re 4th and long so you better be REALLY careful with what you say or do next”.
This is when a team tries a play that has a very low chances of success. For example, if you decide to go out at the last minute and want to try a new restaurant that’s really crowded, so “I know this is a ‘Hail Mary’ play but lets go by that new restaurant and see if they can squeeze us in!”
This is when the defense “gangs up” on the quarterback. If you’re man is yelling at you or starts complaining about something seemingly out of nowhere tell him to “lay off the blitz”.
Referees call this penalty when a player throws a tantrum or parades around after making a play. If your man is rude to you, impolite or is talking about how great they are just say “OK, I’m slapping you with an unsportsman-like conduct penalty”.
This is when a player is a little bit too aggressive, especially after a play is finished. If your man starts getting nasty during a disagreement or calling you names tell him that you’re “slapping him with an unnecessary roughness penalty”.
This is when a member of the defense attacks the receiver in some way to prevent them from being able to catch the ball. When you’re trying to share or explain something to your man (especially because you’re trying to connect with him) and he just keeps interrupting you tell them you’ll “I’m trying to connect with you! You’re getting a 15-yard penalty for pass inteference”.
This is when one team “jumps the gun” before the play. If you’re getting intimate with your man and they’re moving faster than you’d like OR they’re trying to rush you into sex (especially without romancing you) tell them they’re “about to get penalized for a false start”.
Teams call this to pause the game and catch their breath or figure out what they want to do next. Use this in the middle of a fight to give both of you a chance to catch your breath and calm down, as in “OK, I’m calling a timeout here. Let’s figure out what’s really going on here and get back to loving each other”.
Even though this post was a bit on the lighter side the advice is still absolutely useful and effective, and can help bring a more playful aspect to your communications.
Until next time…
Live in love!